Let's face it, February in UK can be tough, especially with all these storms we have been experiencing. I've been speaking to various people recently who have been finding it's been "getting to them". I am a big fan of jumping on a plane to find the sunshine but I understand this is not always possible. So how to survive February in UK if there is no other way to escape?! This is the first February I have been in UK and am actually really enjoying myself, this is because I have planned for it. I have planned to do things I really enjoy, all month, in fact right through to July. I am especially treating myself this month though to the things that lift my spirits and lead me to new experiences, which is what lights me up. The result of doing this means I am enjoying the moment and excited about the future, a recipe for happiness.

It can be easy to get in the mindset of "getting through it", wishing time away, head down until it's all over. That's 28 days of missed out opportunity for fun and exploration though!

Now this doesn't have to mean lots of activity. February is a great month of some restorative time before all the energy of Spring. You have the wisdom inside of you to know what is best for you right now.

What could you plan to make this February special? To make yourself feel good?

I also think it's important to get out in the sunshine when ever it does show it's face. Just to sit in the sun, even when cold, for 15-30 minutes nourishes your soul.

Nature has a way of rebalancing body and mind. If you find yourself in a bit of a down phase, wrap yourself up and go outside, even for a bit. Then notice the shifts you feel from walking in nature. I always find walking along the beach calms my mind, even when the waves are going crazy with the wind!

Fill your body with food with a strong life force. It can be easy to use alcohol and drugs to escape but after the high will come the low and it will be a whole lot worse! Lack of sleep, a drop in blood sugar and toxins all contribute to emotional lows. Take care of your body and your mind will notice the difference too!

Helping others is also a win win situation, when you extend your compassion to outside of yourself the receiver will benefit and so will you. There are many people (and animals) in the world struggling to really survive right now, and not so far afield with the awful situation in Somerset. Take action where you can to help someone in need.

If you need a helping hand you may like to check out this fab challenge - 100 Happy Days. You simply take a photo of something that makes you happy every day and share it on social media with #100happydays or if you'd rather keep it out of the public domain you simply send them your photos.

I am going to start my challenge today, if you'd like to follow me I'll share it via Twitter - LouiseatCreate. ( and if you take on the challenge please let me know how I can follow you too!)

.....and remember nothing stays the same, it will be Spring before we know it :-)

Much love

 

 

 

ps I am running a yoga workshop this weekend if you fancy getting out of the rain and having some me time! x

  This is just a little post to remind you that....

only you know what is best for you.

Life bombards us with solutions. Well meaning friends and family offering their opinions and advice. Media telling us all the things we should be giving up or starting. A million self help books, therapies, coaches to help you with every situation possible.

It's amazing there is so much help out there!

When it comes down to it, you have the wisdom inside to know what you need the most. That often quiet little voice in your head that can get over powered by the often shouting voice of the ego. The ego is driven by attachment and fear. Attachment to your identity, to things being a certain way, to how you look, what others think and fears that have built up over the years.

That soft voice that comes from your heart, that you feel in your gut, that's the one to listen too.

When I coach people it's about connecting to what you really want deep down, not what you feel you should be doing. Sometimes we don't even set goals, sometimes what my clients prefer is to focus on a way of being, an intention that shapes their life every day. It's completely up to them as only they know what help they need and what they really want to get out of life.

Sometimes the challenge is to hear and trust your own wisdom. We so often look externally for the solution to our problems. Don't get me wrong, it's wonderful to get fresh ideas, new insights and to learn new things that will help us. All that learning will help you make the next decision about what is best for you, from within.

If you are facing a decision and are feeling swayed by external factors, just trust that you know what is best for you. That doesn't mean it won't feel a bit (or a lot!)  scary sometimes but that's when it gets exciting, you are moving beyond boundaries and past fears to grow.

Namaste

 

Over the past 8 years I have given up a few habits that haven't served me well; partying to excess, eating meat, wheat bread, cows milk, coffee and more recently eating chocolate every day. I have learnt from the experience that simply not wanting to do it any more isn't always enough. When what you are doing causes you any form of enjoyment then denying yourself of what you perceive as feeling good, even if it's just for a few moments, can lead you to want to do it more.

There needs to be a bigger purpose, something you want more, something that inspires you and is for your highest good. In my case I am inspired by being at my optimum health, after a childhood of always being ill I didn't want to be that sickly child any more, and having mental clarity to be able to approach life with a positive and loving attitude. I also wanted balanced energy levels, as I was so up and down before, I was sick of that afternoon crash feeling when all I wanted to do was sleep. I learnt that feeling tired led to my emotions being out of balance too. The motivation behind taking care of my health, emotions, mental state and energy was not only for me but also for my business, so I could be fit and healthy to help and inspire others too. This is my passion. I felt I couldn't really be an authentic life coach and yoga teacher if I wasn't taking care of myself first.

Once I had the inspiration in place then I looked for things to replace the old habits with, things that would cause me just as much pleasure and more. Alternatives that were actually good for me rather than being temporary lifts or escapism that ended in some kind of crash afterwards. For example:

• A big part of going out for me was that I love to dance, I now go to ecstatic dance sessions (which do not serve alcohol)  or simply go out with the intention to dance and not to drink.
• I make sure the food I cook is really tasty so that I don't miss meat.
• I have found a lovely Rye bread (The Village Bakery - they sell in Waitrose)  that for me is just as enjoyable as wheat bread, in fact I prefer it now.
• I have adapted my taste buds to almond milk now, this did take a while but now I can't imagine having cows milk with cereal. The pleasure I gain from this is the fact I am not so congested any more.
• I have found some herbal teas that I really enjoy drinking, and every now and then I have a decaffeinated coffee. The sleepless nights, up and down emotions, busy mind and heightened stress levels I experience from coffee were worth giving up!

Our brain does not hear the negative, if I tell you now not to think of a red dress - what springs to mind? When you tell yourself "I am not going to X" you mind hears "I am going to X". Rather tell yourself what you are going to do instead.

A daily afternoon sugary sweet treat as been the hardest thing I have found to give up because it's tied into emotions for me as well, I see it as a treat. So I have found it important to look for other more healthy things that I experience as a treat too, I do enjoy savoury snacks as well like hummus and rice cakes, taking time out to go sit on the beach front when the sun is shining and coconut balls are amazing as they taste just like chocolate truffles but there is no refined sugar, the sweetness comes from the coconut and dates . Liquorice or cinnamon tea also taste sweet but with out the sugar. I do love to go out for tea and cake with friends though, and I still will, it just won't be an every day occurrence!

My experience with sugar and caffeine is that it is actually an addiction. The headaches experienced when I stopped every day coffee were unbelievable and lasted for 2 weeks solid. My body actually craved the sugar and my mind was very cleverly trying to convince me that some things would be ok, like ice cream?!!  With things like this will power is key, and that is where your inspirational higher purpose kicks in. It is said it takes 3 weeks to form a new thought pattern and create a new habit, so flexing your willpower muscles for those few weeks is prime and doing healthy things that feel good for you to nurture yourself in the meantime.

Falling in love with yoga was a big turning point for me, to be able to still my mind, be present, take care of my body and learn from the practice I needed to give up mental stimulants and foods that make me feel heavy. The love of how yoga makes me feel outshines the need for the other stuff. Yoga might not be the thing for you but there will be something out there that is, something that will inspire you enough to give up the stuff that holds you back from really enjoying it.

Focus on the good, what you are inspired by, what really motivates you and one day you will realise that the light has outshone the darkness. It's not easy giving up something but when you do, you have strengthened that will power muscle and in turn the belief in yourself that you can do anything you put your mind too.

If I can help you in any way on your journey please let me know; [email protected]

Much love,

Louise x

 

  How often to you blame others or circumstances for how you are feeling?

How often do you tell yourself stories, justifications, about why you are not where you want to be?

Any time you blame  or justify you are giving your power away. It's as simple as that.

Any time you count on something external to make you happy you are not in control.

Yes sometimes people do treat us appallingly, sometimes people do not behave the way we'd like them too but it's still up to us how we choose to deal with it.

How many stories have you told yourself already this year about why; you can't leave a job you hate, why you are single, why you can't leave an unhappy relationship, why you have to do something you really don't want to do...... We do this to make ourselves feel better to justify why we are not really doing what we want. How does that really feel deep down though?

What ever is going on externally in an area you are not happy in, ask yourself the following question:

What can I do to take responsibility for this?

The moment you take responsibility to make changes in an area you are not happy in, that is the moment you claim back your power.

Even when you don't see it as your responsibility. Even when someone else is not doing something "right". When you take control anyway of what you need in the situation you empower yourself.

Have a look at your life right now. Are you giving your power away to any situation or person?

A clue is to look at which area of your life you feel most drained in. When we feel stuck, helpless, reliant, controlled, and so on, we loose our energy.

Then ask that question - what could I do to take responsibility for my life in this area/with this relationship/person.....?

Make this week the week you empower yourself!

Much love

 

  Special time with a loved one flies by.

Time doing something you don't enjoy slows down to a snails pace.

Yet it's the same time. 60 seconds in a minute and 60 minutes in an hour.

When we really want to do something we have the time. When we are reluctant, no time can be a great excuse.

I have found over the years when I have taken on big projects in my life, I have always found enough time and I've actually achieved more than I imagined at the beginning. It can be very easy to put off making a change you want for fear of there not being enough time. This might end up being the case if it's something you don't really want but if you are inspired and excited about it you will find the time.

Time is a lot like money in this sense. You will find the money for something you really want deep in your heart. It's all a question of priorities.

Some times though our priorities become out of balance. We prioritise the things that are not really best for us, but we feel we "should" do. As I have said before the word "should" usually indicates you are living by someone elses values, what your friends, family/ partner would do. That doesn't mean it's right for you.

Time can get sucked up in a relationship that doesn't feel right or serve you well. Time can get sucked up doing a job you hate. Time can get sucked up putting everyone else before your needs.

It's a common misconception that putting yourself before others is selfish. The thing is if you don't spend time to nurture and nourish yourself  then the energy you put into helping others may be tinged with negativity, resentment for example. There is a big difference between doing something out of duty and doing something from a place of love.

When you follow your dreams, take care of yourself and do what is best for you, then you'll find you have an abundance of energy and love to help others. You'll truly be giving from the heart.

There is enough time. You will find it if you really want it.

There is enough money. You will find it if you really want it.

So what do you really want?

Commit it it and allow the change to flow into your life.

Namaste

Happy New Year! I love the start of a new year, the feeling of a new beginning, where life feels like a blank canvas and anything is possible. The reality of it though is that every day is a new beginning. In fact every moment is one too. We always have the choice to begin a new project, to set a new intention, to feel how we wish to feel. That power is always within us.

It all begins with a decision.

Have you had times in your life where you decided something was going to happen and it did?

Or maybe other times when you were a little on the fence, a bit hesitant to commit, slightly unsure what you actually wanted. How was that experience?

I "thought about" moving to Brighton for about 7 years before I actually did it. I would always say, "maybe next year", "maybe when I have met someone", "maybe one day.....". Until 2011 when I actually decided 2012 was to be the year, and here I am.

Once a firm decision is made life starts to conspire to help make it happen. Actions are more driven, determined and there is more power behind them. We start to notice ways to make it happen and act on them. People step forward to offer help. We get creative.

Until a decision is made how does the Universe/God know how to help you?

Sometimes the Universe/God will take control, something out of your control will happen to force you into making a decision.....redundancy, a break up, loosing your home and so on. I have often heard people say to me that a break up/ being made redundant was the best thing that could have happened to them as it led them to doing what they really wanted to do in the end.

It may take years though for God/the Universe to have enough and give you a kick up the backside......years of feeling lost, procrastinating, feeling annoyed with yourself for not doing what you really want.

What if this was the year you made the decision? How would that be?

What would you decide?

I'd love to know!

Namaste

 

 

 

  Happy Christmas!

Hope you have all survived the storms with out too much damage. I thought my windows may blow in last night!

In the last of my Christmas video blogs I give you a centring technique to help be present in the moment. Something that can be tricky to do when there is lots going on and when you have lots on your mind.

Christmas is a perfect opportunity to relax, so allow yourself to switch off and enjoy the moment this Christmas time whether you are on your own, with friends or with family.

 

Lots of love and Christmas cheer!

Louise x

  In the third of my video blogs this morning I give you an idea of something special to express yourself to those you love around Christmas time.

 

 

Just to remind you that the last posting date is Friday if you would like to order any vouchers for any of my services; Reiki Healing/ 1-1 Yoga sessions/ Life Coaching/ Image Consultancy. I can tailor packages for each individual.

I also have a couple of coaching options to help you make the changes you wish for in 2014; a bumper 4 hour Create 2014 coaching session  (there is an offer running for bookings made before 31st Dec) or a life coaching Create 2014 eCourse. Please click on the links for more details.

Happy Christmas!

Louise x

 

 

 

  This week in the second of my Christmas video blogs  I share with you some life coaching type questions to help you do a review of 2013. It's a really useful exercise to take stock of the year; what has gone well, what have you learnt and what would you do differently. These help to prepare you thinking about what is next for 2014.

 

If you would prefer to run through these with me and let me help you create your goals for 2014 please do get in touch to find out how I can help. [email protected]

The count down to Christmas is on! As lovely as Christmas can be it can also be a stressful or emotional time, but you always have the power to create your reality of any situation. You can choose how you wish to be this Christmas, and this can be done by setting an intention. My intention for this Christmas time is Creativity and Love. As a result I have decided to be creative and make you some Christmas video blogs this month! In this first one I give you an exercise to help set your intention for this Christmas period:

 

  I find books a great source of inspiration and comfort. I aim to read them all cover to cover but often I dip in and out of them, just reading the bits that help me in that moment. There are so many great inspirational, self help, spiritual books out there that it's always a case of finding a writer that really resonates with you.

I love all of Susan Jeffers books which centre around conquering fear, allowing yourself to feel comfortable with uncertainty and to fully embrace living in the flow of life. I am also a huge fan of Robert Holden who truly writes from the heart, reading his book Loveability is like meditating on love. I keep his book Shift Happens by the bath for every day inspiration! Alan Cohen and Melody Beattie's books are full of lovely meditations to start each day and act as a source of comfort for any time.

Right now these are my top 10 favourite inspirational books at the moment, that I dip in and out of regularly;

 

 

I keep these to hand and dip into them when ever I feel I need to. I read out meditations from Journey to The Heart in my yoga classes and I start the day by reading a passage from A Deep Breath of Life. Little practices like this help to keep your mind inspired, empowered and in touch with your true self - a beautiful heart centred being.

Of course they all make lovely presents too, with Christmas coming up and all that! I'd love to hear what books you find inspiring, please do leave a comment on Facebook or Twitter to share!

Much love

Often when I suggest to clients to focus on being loving to themselves, they look at me a little confused unsure of what this actually means. When you are in the habit of  giving to others all of the time, switching it around and taking care of yourself can sometimes feel a little like new territory. Being loving to yourself is so important though, especially in tough times, when your energy feels depleted. Our human way is often to search to feel good externally for example; waiting for that certain person to cheer you up, something to happen so you can feel happy or your job to make you feel like a success.  When we learn to be loving to ourselves we learn we can feel comforted and supported when ever we need it.

Being loving to yourself is not selfish, in fact for you to have the right energy to be able to give to others it's important to give to yourself first, otherwise resentment can build up. Have you ever experienced the feeling of doing something for someone else when you really don't feel like doing it? It's certainly not from a loving caring mindset is it?

Following are 5 ways to be loving to yourself today:

1. Stand up for what is best for you and get your power back. When we expect other people to make us happy we loose our power, we may put up with behaviour that doesn't serve us well. The longer this goes on the worse we feel and harder it feels to pull out of the situation. Look at what is not working for you and make a decision to not tolerate it any more. Yes that may mean a difficult conversation needs to be had but in the long run you will feel a whole lot better when you are in your power.
2. Do something you really feel like doing, even if you think you "shouldn't" for what ever reason. We can put so many barriers in our way to doing what we really want to do. If you are feeling sad, and all you feel like doing is eating cake and watching movies then just allow yourself that luxury for the day. If you are stressed and just fancy a day off all things work related, then just do it. It's only one day.
3. Pamper yourself. Do what ever feels good for your body whether it's a hot bath, practising yoga, hula hooping, going for a walk. Our body holds emotions too, nurture it, bring it back to balance and treat it with love.
4. Speak to someone you love. Chatting to someone who makes you laugh, who listens and who loves you unconditionally will naturally help to lift your spirits.
5. Give your self 5 compliments. How often do you do this? Make the time to do it today.

If none of these feel appropriate or loving to you then ask yourself, "how would I treat someone I love?". Then treat yourself like that.

Lots of love

Louise x

  In any given moment you always have a choice.

A choice of how you choose to behave, to think, to react, what words to use or what next step to take.

Sometime it doesn't feel that way. Life can feel stuck, like there are no options. That is also just a choice, to see it in that way. There are always options.

Even in the darkest moment there is a choice of how you choose to take care of yourself, to be loving to yourself. You can choose to look for what the situation is teaching you, what lesson there is to learn.

Or of course you can choose to allow the darkness to take you down, to give into it, to wallow in negativity.

You choose every day how to spend your time, is it on activities that nourish you? That you enjoy? That give you what you need to feel good?

Or do you choose to block life out with forms of escapism like drinking to excess, drugs etc Activities that might feel fun at the time but bring you crashing down after.

You have the power within you to create your life, to choose how you feel, to choose your thoughts in any given moment.

To begin with it's a case of being aware of what you are saying to yourself. Noticing when you start to put yourself down, think negatively or behave in a damaging way to yourself and others.

Then ask yourself questions like:

• What would be more loving to myself, and others.
• How can I positively contribute to myself and others?
• What could I do to make a difference?
• How can I nourish myself for my highest good?

What if just for today you choose to feel good and to make others feel good to? If that was your only purpose for today?

 

How often do you find yourself putting something off? Saying "I am too busy".

"There is not enough time".

How ever if someone you really love (or would love to) to spend time with called you up and said they had booked you both to fly to The Caribbean this evening for a surprise holiday, I bet you'd find the time!

When you really want something, you make time.

So why do we sometimes still get caught in the time trap even when there are things we really would like to do. Maybe it's that we just don't prioritise enough to make time for our goals.

If not careful days can fly by into weeks, months and before we know it a year has gone by and we still have not learnt to hula hoop "insert what ever your dream is"!

If there is something you really want to achieve, scheduling it in your diary helps you to say no to the things that are not as important to you. For example if you want to start doing yoga then write the class you want to go to in your planner every week, that way if something else less important comes up it's easier to say no to.

Maybe it's going on a trip abroad, you could schedule in how much you will save each week, ideas of things you could do to find the money each week, time for planning it, time for researching flights and time for booking.

Of course plans need to be flexible and you never know something better might come along that changes the course of your life altogether but just by having some time scheduled in for what you really want with help you feel empowered, in action and cuts out wasting time on things you may have just been doing out of habit (eg watching TV/ gazing at social media).

We are coming up to the end of the year soon (another example of how time flies!), if you'd like some help reviewing how 2013 has gone and creating your goals for next year I am offering a bumper Create 2014 coaching session which will include:

• A review of 2013
• Intention (Goal) setting & planning how you’ll achieve them
• Manifestation techniques to help make your dreams a reality
• NLP to help you be in the best mindset to really go for it

I am offering a discount for bookings made before 31st December – £150, usual price £240.

Please let me know if I can help!

Lots of love

 

  Ten years ago when I first set up my business as a new image consultant I began to go to networking events. I hated them, I felt uncomfortable and felt under pressure to sell myself enough to find a new business in just one evening. I used to dress up in a suit which just didn't feel like me which only added to my discomfort.

Then one day it dawned on me, what if I was just to go along and be myself rather than someone I thought I should be. So I ditched the suit for the kind of colourful clothes I loved and started to view networking events as a chance to just make some new friends. I'd always been good at meeting new people so this felt much more natural. Networking suddenly became a whole lot easier and now I actually enjoy it.

This mindset spilled out into the rest of my business and my life, just to be myself. I know it sounds obvious but how often do we put on a front, an act, to try to be something else we thing we should be.

When you are not being truly authentic you can give off mixed messages. Have you ever met someone where something just didn't feel quite right? An example of where I notice it often is when someone is super confident, almost over the top but there comes across an underlying insecurity beneath the surface.

We are all created perfectly unique. We all have our own beauty, individual talents and inner qualities. When we try so hard to be something we are not we are going against the purpose of our lives; which is to just be our true selves and bring our unique gift to the world.

Life just gets easier when we are ourselves, we quit wasting so much energy when we give up trying to be something we are not. Comparison to others and trying to be like them will only ever lead us to living an inauthentic life which can be exhausting and damaging for our Spirit.

One of the magical things about just being yourself is that you start to attract people into your life that are a match for you. Like attracts like.

Since setting up my business ten years ago I have evolved into quite a different person to what I was back then. I was a party girl, spending most weekends out clubbing and drinking. Since discovering personal development, yoga and Spirituality all this has changed, I have different priorities now and a different lifestyle.

The transition to who I am now was an interesting one as I had changed but my friends hadn't, they were leading the same lives but I was following a different path. It can be hard when people are used to you drinking with them to suddenly say "I'll have a water please!". Although not always easy I stuck to my guns and was just open about the changes I was going through, sharing my journey with my friends and finding new ones.

Of course some friendships have fallen by the way side, sometimes in life you just go in different directions, but now I am surrounded by people who really know who I am, what's important to me and we are there for each other.

I have found that by just being me it encourages others to do the same. This is also the purpose of writing this post this morning, to encourage you to just be you. We are all made completely unique for a reason, you have a perfect combination of gifts, qualities and beauty that is just right for you. There is a partner, a job, a lifestyle, a future that is all just right for you. Trying to be someone or thing else will not help you get there, all you need to do is just be yourself.

With lots of love,

 

Is there something you want to do but for some reason you are just not doing it? You know you really want it but it's just not happening. You feel stuck, the more stuck you feel the worse you feel and then it's even hard to get out the stuck-ness. It can feel impossible to get motivated to do anything.

Sound familiar?

This feeling of being stuck often is covering up something else and uncovering what it is can be the key to get you in to action.

To explore what it might be try out these following questions:

1. What are you pretending in this situation? For example what is the story you are telling yourself or others about why you are stuck.
2. What are you really covering up here? What is really going on. Is there a fear? Fear can keep us in our safety zone. Do you even really want this? Lack of motivation often means what you want to achieve isn't really something you are passionate about but instead something you feel you "should" do.
3. What impact is this having on you?
4. How is this impacting other people in your life?
5. What would be a new, more empowering way to be in this situation?
6. How will you be behaving if you are being like this?
7. What is one action you could do now, being this way, to get you started?
8.  DO IT!

Sometimes just getting started is the hardest part. Picking something small and taking a baby step can get you going on your way.

If you are really sure this is something you 100% want but you just keep procrastinating, then another trick is to set something up to put some pressure on yourself, a deadline. I have been thinking about writing a book for a while now but it's been the first thing that slips when my time is busy because there has not been a set deadline. Until now. I am entering a competition to win a book publishing deal and the deadline is in April. Now that is still quite far away so I have also set up a chat with a publishing adviser to help me with my book idea in 3 weeks time, this will definitely get me into action to have something prepared to talk to her about then.

These days the on line world, especially social media sites, can be a complete distraction. If you find yourself putting something off but spending hours on line then give your self a digital detox! Switch off for a while so you can focus on what you really want to achieve.

Ultimately if you really want something in your life it's up to you to make it happen, no one else. Procrastinating can be so soul destroying as whilst you are doing nothing you are often feeling bad about not doing the very thing you want to be. Either do nothing and enjoy it or get into action!

"If it's to be, it's up to me"

If you still find yourself struggling, I can help you with Life Coaching & NLP, please give me a call for a chat to find out how. 07779 150886.

Louise x

 

  How much of your energy is spent trying to control something; your relationship, a work project, your business, anything really where you want it to be a certain way.

Taking control of your life, getting your power back, by doing what you love and what feels right for you is energising. On the flip side control can be exhausting if pushed for too much and exerted over situations (or people) external to ourselves.

Trying to get control over things that are external to us really is born out of fear. Fear of uncertainty, rejection, failure, looking stupid, the list is endless.

One thing we can be sure in life is that nothing stays the same, life is constantly evolving. As much as we can try to make something a certain way it is going to change at some stage. The beauty is that in the unexpected we learn, grow and evolve.

We can not control other people. It's as simple as that. Just as we can not be controlled by others, people can try but when we are in our own power we stand up for what is right for us.

In terms of relationships the more you try to control a loved one the more likely you are to push them away. Control can be seen as being needy, desperate or the flip side oppressive, domineering and often frightening, none of which you wish for in a partner.

Trying to control another is not a display of love, more a demand that they give you what you want. Being loving to someone allows them the freedom to be themselves, to give to them without expecting anything in return. If you catch yourself telling someone you love them then getting upset when they don't reply the way you wish, was that really expressing your love from your heart?  Or were you simply saying it to illicit a response from them, a form of control.

Notice through out your day today, or week, where you are trying to gain control. Notice how it feels. Notice what expectations you are putting on others and how you feel when they don't get met.

Ask yourself, what is really going on in this situation? What is the fear?

The flip side of fear is love. Once you recognise your fear ask yourself how can I be more loving to myself in this situation?

Forgive yourself for having these fearful thoughts and choose love instead. Love conquers over fear.

Much love.

 

Do you have any idea what your calling is in life? That drive, that passion for something that you just can't not do. Your calling sends you out of your comfort zone, you will do anything to make it happen.

It isn't necessarily your career, after all we are not our job title.

I feel mine is to help people live a life they love, whether it's with a client, a friend, a family member or anyone else I come into contact with. I have experienced what it feels like to feel really stuck, to hate a job you are in, to feel trapped in a relationship, to abuse your health and not have the courage to get out. Luckily this is an experience of my past, I love my life now and i'll never look back. I just want to help people in similar situations to get unstuck and create a life they love too.

Here are a few questions that may help you find some clarity around what your calling is too:

• If money were not an issue, what would you do with your time?
• What do you really love to do? You know that thing where you get so lost in time and completely immersed in it.
• What do you hate to do?
• What gives you energy?
• What drains you?
• In what area would you like to make a difference?
• Which area of the population do you feel drawn to help?
• What do you want to experience more of?
• What lights you up and lifts your heart?

As you go through your day pay attention to your heart; those moments when it flutters, when you feel a sense of love, are indicators of something being right for you, something to pursue and something to listen to.

Open your heart and your mind to the idea that you don't necessarily have to "find" your calling, your calling may just find you.

Namaste

 

Love is our natural state of being, it is what we are made of and who we are.

I am not talking about romantic love, just love. Love for our selves, for other people, animals, our planet and doing what we love. Love is hard to describe isn't it? It's a feeling, an energy and mostly a way of being.

We often get swayed away from "being love" though, often when we feel afraid of something.

I just caught myself out doing just that. I had planned to write a new e course this afternoon, something to give away on this website to people who sign up to my newsletter. I was all fired up  and ready to go then realised my email marketing system is down. Instantly I felt frustrated, stuck and not sure what to do next. My afternoon was not going according to plan!

This was a state of fear....fear of not doing enough for my business and even deeper than this; fear of it failing.

I sat and started at my laptop wondering what I could do instead, different ideas of blog posts to write came to mind but nothing was inspiring me until I calmed down and asked myself what do I love to write about? What inspires me? That's love.

In that moment I chose to do what I love and what I would love to write about.

As we go through each day we can swing between being in a state of love and experiencing fear. Fear of failure, not being good enough, being let down, being hurt, rejected, being stuck, being bored, looking stupid, being too clever, being too independent, needing someone too much.....the list of fears are endless.

Any time we are in a state of fear though we are not being loving to ourselves. Our thoughts become negative and we self sabotage.

My blog post to you today is a reminder to choose LOVE constantly through out your day.

Forgive yourself for having negative thoughts.....and then choose love instead.

Say kind, encouraging words to yourself.

Choose to do things you love to do, and even if there are something's you have to do that you'd rather not then ask yourself how could you make them more fun?

Think of those you love, and then send them love. Think of those that love you, and then send them love too.

Think of those you don't love, then send them love.

Volunteer, serve, give, do a random act of kindness, anything to share your love.

Love is not exclusive to just one person, love yourself and love everyone you come into contact with. We are all having a human experience, trying to do the best we can with the upbringing and life we have had so far. Yes sometimes we get it wrong, forgive that and choose love instead.

Love is where we find our power, our true selves, our humility, our joy and our connection with others.

Love really is all we need.

  We all have a story don't we?

You know the one about why you couldn't follow your dream when you were younger and how you've ended up doing something "that'll do" instead.

Or maybe it's the one about how someone broke your heart and now you'll never let anyone close to you again.

Perhaps it's the one about how you became over weight and it's impossible to loose it now.

Or the one about how you can't leave your job and other responsibilities to really do what you want instead?

Your story is the one you hear yourself repeating to people you meet and when justifying yourself.

The more you repeat your story the more it becomes your truth.

I can hear you all ready shouting at the screen "but it happened! it is the truth!".

Yes maybe the event happened but it's the meaning we give to the event that is where we can sabotage ourselves if we are not careful.

Often when something doesn't go our way we make it mean something negative about ourselves. We take it personally.

We add our interpretation to the event, to try to make sense of it, we then tell others and the more we find ourselves repeating it the more it becomes fact.

A typical example is when a relationship breaks down. Aside from the bare fact that of just not being right for each other, our mind quickly goes into overdrive working out why, and often what we personally did wrong. What was wrong with us or them. If we are not careful this is where we can start to form (or back up) negative beliefs about ourselves or men/relationships in general.

At this point we create a whole story around it that we then discuss with friends to try and figure out why it didn't work out. This can be so dangerous though if we are not careful as it's easy to make things up in our minds that we really do not know are the truth. Often they are not.

We go through life with these stories which can then turn into justifications about why we can not move forward in an area we'd most like to. We hold on to them as we like to be right, even if they hold us back.

Following is a great exercise to help to dissolve a story that could be holding you back;

Pick the story you feel you carry with you the most. The one that you tell yourself why you can't be fully living how you'd like to be.

Write it with the meaning you have already given it. Then.....

Write it with a comedy meaning.

A adventurous meaning.

A scary meaning.

The most outrageous meaning you could give it.

A shocking meaning.

A sweet meaning.

A lovely meaning.

A meaning that was of benefit to you.

A meaning taking into account your age at the time it happened, what your adult self can see now.

A compassionate meaning.

A meaning you would give it if you truly loved yourself and knew you were good enough.

Just notice how it feels now when you think of that story.

We can choose to perceive any event in our lives in a way that supports us, where we can learn from it and gain motivation from it. Take some time to look at the stories you tell yourself why you are not doing what you really want, then ask yourself; how much longer am I willing to hold on to these and allowing them to hold me back in my life?

Maybe now is the time to let them go.