Synchronicity; Living Life in the Flow

  The Celestine Prophecy was the first inspirational, spiritual type book I ever read. It was one of those “in” books that you saw every other traveller on the beach reading back then. One concept that I loved from that book was about synchronicity. Synchronicity is when you are really living life in the flow, things are going well, you are noticing opportunities that present themselves and embracing them. An example of this is when you think of a person and then they suddenly get in touch or you bump into them. The idea is that there are no coincidences but people and opportunities are put in your way for a reason. When you are aware of this you learn to pay attention to the people and situations that come into your life and allow yourself to learn from them.

I had an experience of just this about 6 years ago, I bumped into a man I had met in a club a few months before who I had not really wanted to see again, simply because I thought we would have nothing in common. As I really believe you don’t just see people again for no reason I went up to him to say hello. The result of this was over a few months he introduced me to personal development, which I fell in love with and then decided to be a coach! Who knows if I had not gone up to him that day I might not be writing this article today. Meeting him really did change my life, and to think I could have easily ran off in the other direction!

There are a few things that block our lives from being open to our lives just flowing like this;

1) Resistance; this is another word for fear. Fear of change and uncertainty is something that can keep us stuck in the same place doing the same things for years. We make excuses and justifications of why we don’t go for what we really want deep down. This blocks the energy and gets in the way of noticing ways to make your life how you would love it to be. 2) Need for control; we have a habit of wanting to plan and control everything. Whilst goals are good to visualise what you want and attract opportunities to make them happen you can also be too attached to them if you are not careful. Then you feel upset if they don’t happen. We really don’t know what is around the next corner and it’s wise to learn to feel stable within uncertainty. We grow and develop new personal qualities in uncertainty, it’s an exciting time. Meditation helps to create inner strength to cope with any situation; you can get over fear and find happiness and energy when you allow yourself just to be in the flow. I have had many goals where I haven’t known how I will achieve them and then a few months later I look back and realise I did but in a completely different way to what I had planned.

3) Expectation; this is really another form of control, we set expectations of how a situation should be or how a person should behave then we get upset then it doesn’t happen that way. Everyone has their own way of doing things and their own freedom; it’s unfair to put expectations on them. Allow people just to be themselves and just focus on being your amazing self.

In this moment is where the magic happens, pay attention to it, notice opportunities and look out for what you can learn.

Coping with an injury

  Posted by Louise but written by Michael!

Injuries, they’re inevitable. At one time or another you are going to hurt your arm, your back, your knee, something on your body is going to get injured and you have to cope with it. If you’re lucky the medical advice may be a simple: just rest it for a bit. Or you might hear the dreaded words of: you need surgery. Either way, simple injury or life changing one, coping with an injury is not always easy.

If you are normally an active person dealing with any kind of injury can be quite difficult. There are emotional issues as well as physical issues you have to work through. The following strategies may make the process easier and help you come out of recovery quicker.

Acknowledge your injury Before you can start to recover, you have to first acknowledge you are hurt. While it can be easy to ignore pain and just “work through it,” if you really are injured the pain is not going to go away but intensify. You may be able to self-diagnose the problem (e.g., your shins hurt because you’ve upped your runs from 3 miles a day to 8 without slowly building your endurance). Or, you may need to see a professional. Understand that it’s not a sign of weakness to seek medical advice, and often it can save you from turning a minor injury into a major one.

Understand your injury Once you know the specifications of your injury you will appreciate what your limitations are and why. For example, if you learn that you have a partially torn cartilage in your arm, you’ll understand why if you continue to use that arm and not let the injury heal, you’re going to eventually have a full-torn cartilage. You also need to understand how you got your injury so that if possible, you can avoid repeat injuries.

Maintain a Positive Attitude Getting hurt and being in pain stinks. It is no fun not being able to do the things you love, especially when all your friends, teammates or training partners can. But the mind is a very powerful thing. A flood of constant, negative thoughts are only going to make the healing process take longer. But research has shown that it may be possible to speed up the healing process by using specific mental skills and techniques such as imagery: imagining the way it will feel when you are recovered, imagining the desired outcome as though it is happening now or has already happened. So keep a positive attitude, remain focused on the good you’re doing (healing your injury), imagine yourself healed and you will recover faster and who knows, maybe even stronger.

Maintain Your Fitness While Injured This is probably the hardest part; maintaining your fitness while recovering. Depending upon the type of injury you have, you will probably have to modify your training or add alternate forms of training to maintain cardiovascular conditioning or strength. While it may not be your favorite form of exercise or work you as hard as you want, but there are always options. For example, if you can't run, perhaps you can cycle or swim. If you can’t do any lower body work, focus on arms and core. Or if you can’t really do much moving around at all, work on relaxation training. Use your recovery time as a time to experiment with new training options. Keep an open mind, you may find out you really love yoga and never knew it. Or that all these years of being a runner you were really meant to be a swimmer. Or not. But just keep moving in whatever capacity you can.

Injuries are an unfortunate fact of life. You may be lucky and never have to cope with a really debilitating injury. But for most of us, even having to take just a few weeks off our normal routine can seem debilitating. But if you acknowledge the injury and learn what it takes to heal it and then follow that advice with a positive attitude, coping with an injury isn’t that bad.

The Joy of Travelling on Your Own

More and more people now go for holidays on their own, to have their own little adventure or simply just to have some down time to themselves. If it is something you have not done before it can seem bit daunting though and not very appealing. I love holidays with friends or family but have had some of the best experiences and have made great new friends when I have gone away by myself. It can really push you out of your comfort zone which is always a good thing to open your mind and boost your confidence. If you are in two minds about whether to go it alone here are my top benefits for travelling alone: 1. You are totally free and independent. You can do what you want when you want. It also means you have to make your own decisions. If you are someone who often needs to consult others before deciding what to do it will help you flex that muscle of trusting yourself and what you want.

2. You meet more people when you are on your own. Whenever I have travelled alone I have never actually been alone for very long as you meet people where ever you go. If you find it hard to meet new people this will be great practise for you in small talk and creating new friendships. Plus the types of people you meet are so diverse you are likely to meet different personalities than you already have in your everyday life. This helps you to see new perspectives and opens your mind to new ways of thinking.

3. You might feel a bit scared; if you have not travelled alone you will be pushed out of your comfort zone. Eating alone, taking an overnight train trip, turning up to a new place without accommodation, booking a local tour not knowing where you are going, getting a bus and not knowing what stop to get off at…..are all examples of things you might not be used to. Doing things that scare you a bit will boost your self-confidence and belief that you can cope with anything. We don’t develop so much when we stay in our comfort zone doing the same things day in day out.

4. You find yourself in situations you never imagined (for example getting up at 4am with a group of people you just met to walk through jungle, hike up a rock face with no safety equipment to a tiny Indian temple to watch the sunrise to then climb down and all have a lovely milky sweet chai tea together) and once home you will look back with fond memories and a huge sense of achievement.

5. You are totally free to do what you want and be yourself. You don’t have to do anything you feel like you “should”, to live up to the expectations of others, you are simply free to be you. This should be the case day to day anyway but unfortunately our minds tend to get caught up with comparing ourselves and pleasing others.

6. You immerse yourself in different cultures which open your mind and help you to see life from new perspectives.

7. It gives you time and space to think and evaluate. Time away from your everyday life and people gives you a chance to see your life from a new perspective, you don’t have other people’s opinions swaying you. You are free to work out what you want from your life all on your own. Which is great as it will be what you really want 100%.

If you are thinking of going off travelling some websites I recommend are:

http://www.lonelyplanet.com/ http://www.travelfish.org/ http://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ http://www.makemytrip.com/

Have fun! For 1-1 confidence coaching please contact Louise at [email protected]

Business Wear Check List

It’s easy to be a little unsure what is totally appropriate for work or not these days with businesses having a more flexible approach to work wear. Unless you are told you have to wear a suit it can be a bit confusing as to what you can and can’t get away with. Whatever the dress code you are likely to want to project a fantastic professional impact, to stand out and get noticed by your boss. A great professional impact is when the style of your clothes is appropriate, in good condition, looked after and fit you properly.

Following is a helpful check list from Aston and Hayes (where I trained as an image consultant) to find out if your clothes are an asset to you or a liability:

	A	B
JACKET
Does your jacket fit properly across the back of your shoulders?	yes	no
Is there 2-3cms of fabric spare at the side of your torso?	yes	no
Are there any obvious creases or stains?	no	yes
Is there any puckering or fabric sheen caused by dry cleaning?	no	yes
Are there any loose buttons or threads?	no	yes
SKIRTS
Is your skirt long enough to cover your knees	yes	no
Does the fabric pull or gape anywhere?	no	yes
TROUSERS
Can you slip your hand easily into your waistband	yes	no
Are your pockets or pleats gaping or pulling?	no	yes
Does the hem rest on the top of your shoe?	yes	no
SHIRTS & TOPS
Are your shirt collars and cuffs pristine?	yes	no
Are you showing too much cleavage?	no	yes
Does the fabric pull anywhere across your bust or torso?	no	yes
Are your tops long enough to avoid showing your midriff?	yes	no
KNITWEAR
Does your knitwear have any bobbles or pulls?	no	yes
Shoes & Hosiery
Are your shoes in immaculate condition?	yes	no
Are your tights free of snags or runs?	yes	no
TOTALS:

Now count up all your A’s and B’s. A is the most appropriate wear to create a professional impact so if you have scored lots of A’s you are doing well! If B was your higher score then it might be a good time for a wardrobe weed to sift out the clothes that don’t work so well anymore and create a key items shopping list to build a fabulous working wardrobe.

Contact me for more details: [email protected]

New Year, New Image Resolutions

  It’s the time of year when everyone is making New Year’s resolutions so I thought I would come up with a few suggestions for getting dressed in 2012! 1) Be Yourself. It’s great to get inspiration from others but then use that to dress exactly how you feel, show your personality, dress to suit your body shape. Whenever we try to fit ourselves into something we are not it can end up feeling uncomfortable and not right somehow. You are amazing just the way you are, dress to show that.

2) Try a new colour. It’s easy to get stuck in a routine of wearing the same colours most of the time. For example many people I meet say to me “I only ever wear black”. Make 2012 the year you experimented with a new colour! Be brave, try one out and see how you feel.

3) Try a new style. As with colour it’s very easy to get into the habit of grabbing the same styles of clothes. Often when I take people shopping I will pick things out they would never have thought of trying and then find themselves pleasantly surprised when they see themselves in the mirror. So next time you go shopping, just take a bit of time to experiment, you never know what you might find!

4) Before springtime plan a wardrobe clear out. It’s the task we often put off month after month but once it’s done you feel fantastic for doing it. Getting rid of clothes that don’t work anymore or remind you of past times you would rather forget is extremely cathartic. It makes way for new energy to come into your life, plus any new purchases! 5) Wear lipstick for a week. If you don’t normally wear lipstick just try out for fun wearing it for a week and see how it feels. No hidden agenda or reason.

6) Try a new hairstyle. As we see on all the makeover shows hair and make-up really make a huge impact. Your hair can dramatically change how you look. If you have had the same style for a few years, how about trying something different for 2012. Again, just for fun! If you really want to treat yourself, go see Jamie Stevens at Errol Douglas in Knightsbridge. He is the hairdresser on Gok Wan’s TV shows and X Factor.

7) Try a new exercise. Exercise makes you feel good inside and out. Whether you don’t do any at all or are stuck in the same routine, try something new this year and see how it feels. I love Zumba and Hot Yoga, both totally lift my spirits and put me in a fantastic mood! When you feel good this shines out.

Happy New Year!!!